There are a few famous Montreal icons that are synonymous with our great city. For example; smoked meat sandwiches, Caleche rides in Old Montreal, the Spoon Man in front of Olgilvy’s, our vibrant night and cultural scene, summer festivals, eclectic neighborhoods, and full contact titty bars. Then there are the not so glamorous things that lend themselves to Montreal’s notoriety but we take credit for and are just as proud of; the deteriorating eyesore of an Olympic stadium, corruption, collusion and the revolving door at city hall (Toronto has nothing on us, in the time their mayoral drug tape tried to surface, the GMA has gone through three mayors and a city bankruptcy; T dot, step your game up), failing infrastructure, and when Celine Dion curls her lips and pounds her chest in a dramatic and cheesy gesture during a crescendo of an adult contemporary pop ballad.
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Mile-end/Plateau Mont-Royal
A big think you to all those who voted for CultMTL’s “Best of Montreal“, which saw Shut Up and Eat listed at Montreal’s top 5 Instagram feeds! If you’re not already following me; you can do so here: http://instagram.com/shutupandeatmtl. You are all awesome and terribly good looking…!
Being said, there is one popular category on this Best of Montreal list that is quite competitive, as all Montrealers have opinions stronger than trolling 15 year olds on the comment sections of YouTube videos – being, best portuguese chicken. For years there have been just a select few big hitters in the world of Portuguese rotisserie chicken and when you align with one team, your line is drawn deep in the sand. Defection will result in slander over the internet with the likes of which can result in you being called a lover of IGA’s finest “chicken” – the shit is drier than a summer day in African with the taste that rivals a BBQed Kleenex box.
I give to you my top three choices for Best Portuguese Chicken in Montreal.
There’s this saying… “Sex is like cold pizza, even when it’s bad, it’s still pretty good.” What kind of self-loving forever-alone son of a bitch came up with this garbage? I’m not going to compare cold pizza to getting laid, why? If you’re satisfied lying down next to something cold, ridged, crusty and that was man-handled and felt up by some hairy dude with sauce on his shirt the night before… then you really need to get off the computer and meet new people.